Pulling Up A Seat At The Table

If you show special attention to the man wearing fine clothes and say, "Here's a good seat for you," but say to the poor man, "You stand there" or "Sit on the floor by my feet," have you not discriminated among yourselves and become judges with evil thoughts?

Listen, my dear brothers and sisters: Has not God chosen those who are poor in the eyes of the world to be rich in faith and to inherit the kingdom he promised those who love him?

- James 2:3-5

I was invited to an exclusive screening of a new documentary, "Then and Now", put out by the Canadian Down Syndrome Society, "a film exploring the past and future of the advocacy movement in Canada as seen through the eyes of Canadians with Down Syndrome." In my mind, the highlight of this event was a stirring and spirited speech on marriage, work and community living, given by a self-advocate and co-chair of the "Voices At The Table Advocacy" (VATTA) Committee, Dale Froese, to set the stage for an inspiring documentary.

Dale shared his journey with us between the "then" of isolation, "spending most of his life living outside of the community", and the "now" of community inclusion, "belonging in all aspects of the community."

Dale put it best, "Hey, who wouldn't want to hang out with a guy like me?"

That's not to say there still aren't challenges to community inclusion. Dale often finds that he's singled out for having a disability - a reverse discrimination that emphasizes his unshared exclusiveness as opposed to our shared togetherness. 

"I don't want people's pity", he looked up at us intently and then returned to his script, "I don't want people to celebrate my successes." He noted that at his workplace customers still treat him with either the unease of ambiguity or a sentimentalism he can't relate to himself. Finally, when workplaces and communities have begun opening doors to people with developmental disabilities and inclusion initiatives, he is still looked down upon - on others one-sided terms - the terms of exclusion.  

"Sometimes you just can't win!" he sighed to the audience's approving laughter. Though people still tend to view his "disability" first as opposed to his personhood, he still concedes generously, "I'm cool with that!"

"Just like everyone else, my routine will start again tomorrow. Tonight, I'll turn over in bed and kiss my wife goodnight." The journey to inclusion can be a long one, but there is wisdom in the simplicity of taking a day at a time and taking in life as it comes every step of the way there. Along the way, Dale's at work making room for one more voice at the table.